A message to 300 moms and the guy trying to save their kids

A bunch of teens break into a huge house, threw a huge party, got crunk, trashed the joint, took selfies, bragged about their parents letting them do what they want, and when the homeowner discovers it, former NFL football player Brian Holloway, he posts the Jersey Shore wannabe selfies on a website calling everyone out. Come help him clean right? No, instead, the parents considered suing because he put their kids on blast on his website (and because they are most likely douchebag crackhead parents). So now he pressed charges.

Boring CBS link to the story: http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2013/09/26/ex-nfl-player-brian-holloway-charge-teens-who-trashed-my-ny-home/

I don't watch the news, so what directed me to this story? Jen from People I Want to Punch in the Throat. Read her blog on the subject here. I agree with her exactly.

My favorite reaction thus far to this story is Kelly's. This was the only video I could find as of now. It's still worth the ghetto quality to see Kelly's reaction if you missed it...




First off, I love you Kelly. Exactly. Boo fucking hoo.

Second off, I love you Brian. It was beautiful of you to give them a chance before pressing charges. These aren't rapists and murderers. They are teenagers, and in my neck of the woods, when someone's child does you wrong, you give them a chance to right it. Way to be part of the village it takes to raise a child, still being all offensive line protecting your QB. And seeing how these crackhead parents are determined to jack their children up more, I'm so glad you did go and press charges. I am so sorry you are now being forced to parent hundreds of other people's teens, but thank you for it.

LOOK AT THE TWEETS

Douche Everywhere. Try not to step in it.

Yes it's easy to assume the parents of these kids are middle class/upperclass versions of crackheads. That they don't have any active role in the parenting of their child. That they feel entitled to lack of responsibility and accountability. That they are too busy going to the mall to realize their kids are behaving like derelicts.

And it's easy to assume their kids are derelicts licking everything like Miley Cyrus dancing with Molly, inserting things into various holes on their bodies and other people's bodies whether it's drugs or dicks, taking a dump on someone's living room floor like gorillas, like "Did you see the girl in the red dress?" as a turd is falling out of their ass like it's not happening... It's REALLY easy to assume this sort of thing based on the tweets written by the children themselves. It's almost like these children WANT people to assume this about them, like it's cool. I must of missed that episode of Saved by the Bell.

I know we want to assume these things so we can be all like, "Thank God I don't have to worry about that happening with my kids because I'm not a crackhead douche." It could happen with your kids. You never know. The very nature of kids is to psychically force you into facing your fears. To make you clean up an enormous mess. To embarrass you. That's their purpose until they find one of their own.

So with that said...

CLICK HERE TO READ ONE OF THE MOM'S OPINIONS

To that mom, there is SOME validity to your logic. Not every kid who attended the party is a baboon asshole criminal. Not every parent of those children are crackheads. We get it. You are embarrassed, and this football player is putting the spotlight on it like a nasty fumble. I understand you do not want to be the next Tony Romo when it comes to internet memes.

Speaking of which... When should you never use a nickel defense? 

We all know the kids are not organized enough to actually plan a huge party in someone else's house. This type of thing just happens like an Ice Cube movie. It wasn't like 300 teenagers one day woke up and said, "Let's go break into this house and trash it for a party." It just kind of happened, and I'm sure many who attended had no idea the house was broken into.

BUT... BUT... It doesn't matter whose house it is. Whether they broke in or one kid's parents were out of town... There's a level of respect for other people's property. I was a kid. I did sneak out to parties. I drank large quantities of alcohol. I engaged in premarital sex with a guy I don't know his name but he gave me a back rub. I played drinking games with vodka AFTER bonging beers and measuring every guy's cock with my key chain tape measure to see who actually did have the biggest dick. I DID THOSE THINGS. I didn't trash anyone's house. I cleaned up after people who were too drunk to know where they were vomiting. I put things back where I found them. I just had respect for someone else's property. Where is yours?

You are quoted, mom of one of the teens,

“I’ll punish him as I see fit,” she said. “I don’t need to punish him as Brian Holloway sees fit.”

I'm sorry for you, but you are on his terms when your kid entered his house, whether wrong place wrong time or not, you are now on his terms. He's not telling you whether or not you should breastfeed your kid, spank or time out. He's telling you, "Hey, your kid helped trash this house, come help me clean it. Let's take this opportunity to teach our kids something positive..." What the hell fuck is wrong with you if you have a problem with that? All I have to say at this point... the F-Word. Felony.

What laws were broken? Let's look this up. New York.

Entering someone's home is criminal trespass in the second degree, and is a Class A misdemeanor. 
Read more: http://www.ehow.com/info_7940671_different-degrees-burglary.html#ixzz2g2iWA8bs

Criminal mischief in the 2nd degree occurs when you act with intent to damage someone else’s property and actually damage it where the damage is valued at more than $1,500. Second degree criminal mischief is a Class D felony which carries a potential sentence of up to 7 years in prison.
Read more http://www.criminalpropertydamage.com/new-york/

A felony makes it virtually impossible to get a job (nevermind college) because you HAVE to list that and explain yourself in every interview competing with people who don't have felonies, and that's worse than your kid's picture plastered on the web... one that was voluntarily taken and put on the web in the first place.

Brian Holloway is not the asshole here. He tried to be nice. He tried to provide an option that didn't entail the f-word. He tried to provide an option that was better for the children's futures. Just because you were too stupid to take advantage of it doesn't make him wrong.

I'm going to give most of those parents the benefit of the doubt and assume that they are punishing their kid for their kid's behavior and stupidity. I'm going to assume that regardless of what you, each relevant mother, say to the press or each other, that you are drilling your kids with lectures about accountability. How they were at the wrong place at the wrong time because they made a stupid decision. How they showed bad judgment, and what can happen when you show bad judgment. And how they are lucky the worst thing to come out of it is destroyed property because you can rebuild a house but you can't rebuild a kid who died of alcohol poisoning or as a result of a DUI.

I'm going to hope that some day you moms in this situation can put your child's needs over your own pride. You should have showed up to clean his house. You should have brought your own broom for it. That's the right thing to do.

And if you moms out there of these children think I'm wrong... Consider this. You are embarrassed because most of the internet thinks you and your kids are wrong. If what you stood for spoke for itself, you wouldn't hide behind anonymity. If you would try to do the right thing, you wouldn't have to hide anymore. We'd all know your kid as the kid who made a mistake and showed up to fix it. But until then, your kid is the kid who hid behind mommy and daddy. If your kid reads this, because you are watching their internet behavior so closely they land on my blog about the fuck word, you don't need your mommy and daddy to make you do the right thing. 


And to everyone reading this, please remember it does take a village to raise a child. No parent is perfect. We all naturally have the innate desire to stand up for our children, even when they are wrong. It's not easy finding that balance between protecting your kid and teaching your kid right from wrong. I'm not defending their actions. I'm not defending their behavior. I'm just reminding you that we all have our skeletons.

The football player showed more forgiveness and love than I did when I first heard this story. I know I'm not the only one.